Yom Sayarot

Erev Tov from the beautiful Kfar Tavor at Shoshana and Iftach Genez' house! Well I had hoped to blog immediately after Yom Sayarot but...that didn't happen. Since nobody said that we could not disclose any information I am gonna write it all down. First of all, the big news: I passed and now I have a tryout for the unit I wanted. The unit is called "the Unit" or more specifically Sayeret Matkal. The tryout, or gibush, is set to take place on November 8. Now, from the beginning. We got there at 3; actually, we all got there a little earlier. They called us over to the registration tin shack things and we handed in our invitation and got our numbers. We then wrote in permanent marker on our white shirts our numbers. My number was 59. Then we got in line at the medical tent and got our pulses checked and a general assessment (about 2 questions). I listed somewhere a while back on my medical report on the Kibbutz that I was allergic to dust. I'm not really, just a little bit. That was a stupid thing to do; all it did was make the army medical lackey suspicious of me. Fortunately the doctor he referred me to at the second set of tables was more understanding and wrote it off as Harta, bullshit. We then waited for a while in the tents that doubled at Shade tents and our dormitories for that night. We were all just milling around when a stout, unathletic 20-year-old came over and chose 10 of us. Eager to find out what we were to do we trotted after him. Our assignment was to open tuna...not even 20 minutes into Yom Sayarot and I was already the army's bitch. We took it in stride and even made fun out of it. One of the guys joked, "Pace yourself, chevre! It's all in your heads, keep opening!" After that there was some more waiting and then some more. There was a lot of waiting during Yom Sayarot and needless to say it was annoying. Eventually we went out to do the Bar-Or Test, or the newly modified version of it. It seems that in the last year or so they have only been doing to 2000-meter run and have left out the push-ups and sit-ups. I came in fifth in my heat out of about 90 other guys with a time of 7:28. I don't believe that it was only 2K because I typically do it a lot faster but then again it was hot and on a sandy surface. After this we assembled back on the main campgrounds and filled out our preferences of which units we wanted. Our choices were between "The Unit", Shayetet/Flotilla 13, and Hovlim (Navy Commanders). I put my first choice as Matkal/the Unit, second choice as Shayetet, and third was Hovlim. The rest of the evening was boring. We got stuff ready for the next day (stretchers, jerrycans, and other stuff), ate, and then went to bed. Bedtime was 7:50 pm, the earliest I've gone to bed in about 10 years. Nobody fell asleep for several reasons. The giant campgrounds light was left on all night, we were sleeping on the ground on the sand with rocks, and it was 7:50! Who goes to sleep at 7:50? After 2.5 hours of turning from side to side I finally fell asleep. We were woken up at 4:00 am but I actually got up, along with some other guys, at 3:30. It gave me some time to get dressed, pee, wash my face, and stretch out and warm up a bit. At 4:07 we were to be in formation and from there we went over to another area of the campgrounds to eat a quick breakfast of chocolate spread on bread and tea. The head doctor of Yom Sayarot then came out and informed us that if anyone did not feel good or wanted to leave, then this would be his last chance to leave and still be given another chance to try out in March or April. At the last second, one guy raised his hand and decided to leave and was then followed by a few other guys. After that we were split into 20-25 groups with about 13-15 guys in each. I was in group #9. We put our valuables (cell phone, wallet, etc.) in the group's "valuables bag" and then, with all our equipment, set out to the training grounds. The beginning of the end of our muscles took place at the sand dunes. We got there, unloaded equipment, and almost immediately started sprints. We started at the top of the dune, and ran in a circular path. The path was probably about 80 meters. After several sprints they said that only the first 8 would be listed. Then after about 10 minutes of that they went down to the first 7. Then 6. Then 5. The hardest part about the sprints was that we would get back completely breathless and they would say, "Tze" or "go!" No break, no nothing. The incline in the sand was also pretty difficult. I don't exactly remember the order of all the drills but after the sprints we got a 7 minute break. Then we had 8 minutes to fill up the sand bags with sand. They were probably something like 15 kilograms, or 33 lbs. We then started to run in the same track as before, but this time with the sandbags and without stopping. After about 20 minutes we stopped. I was one of the leaders in my group with about 35 laps. We also did an exercise with the stretcher. We loaded the stretcher with 4 bags of sand and the first four to arrive would pick up the stretcher and run the next lap with the weighted stretcher. The following three would carry bags of sand. Obviously it was preferred to be carrying the stretcher. I did fairly well on this exercise since I was carrying the stretcher a lot and often arrived first. One thing that I think really improved my standing with the commanders was that when my buddy next to me on the stretcher was having a lot of trouble getting up the incline I gave him some crucial, non-bullshit encouragement and he picked up the pace. After the running exercises each person dug a hole in the sand one meter width, one meter depth, and as long as possible. After this drill, which was not actually too difficult it just wears out your back, we sat in a circle in front of the commanders and gave a little background: where we are from, what we studied in high school, and where we hope to go in the army. There were about 30 Americans at Yom Sayarot from the program Garin Tzabar. There were 3-4 Americans in my group and they seemed to be pretty good guys. One of them also got an invitation to Gibush Matkal. After all the physical assessments we headed back to the campgrounds with the equipment and filled out what is called a Sociometric test (Sotziometri). This is where you rank everyone in your group according to their performance. The best guy would be number 1 and the worst would be highest number of all the people in your group (in mine it was 13). Only 1 guy dropped out in my group and there were groups where 2-3 dropped out which puts the ending number of guys at about 350 (we started with about 400). After the Sociometric, we ate and then waited about 2-3 hours for results. I should give time frames for the events of the day. We started the drills at about 5:00 am and finished at about 8:30 am. At about 9:30 we ate and at about 11:30-12:00 we got the results. Everyone was visibly tense and extremely nervous/excited as some high-ranking officer came out to give us the results. He gave a nice speech about how we are the future of Tzahal and that whether or not we get through to the next rounds, all of us are the elite of the combat units and we will be the next generation of officers and our roles are so important. Without specifying which group the numbers belonged to he told the first group to go to the tent behind him to and to his right. 4, 11, 24, 37, 44, 54...HOLY SHIT, is he gonna skip me?!?! 59. I was ecstatic but I still was not sure whether I had gotten into the gibush for matkal. As we assembled in the tent our suspicions were confirmed as we saw several of the stronger guys from the group. The officer that called our numbers entered the tent a few minutes later and proceeded to congratulate us and tell us that we received gibush matkal. He then reminded us that there is still a long way to go until our position in "the Unit" is secure. We have the incredibly grueling Gibush at Nitzanim in the south on November 8 that will last about 5 days during which they will obliterate us mentally and physically. If you are accepted after this, which in and of itself is an extraordinary feat, you then have an 18 month exhausting Maslul, or training track/path to get through. Even after this there are still those who drop out from injury or just from burn-out. The gibush is incredibly difficult. Of the 400 who start (all of whom are in good shape) only about 200 finish. Of the 200 remaining, 20 are taken to Matkal, 20 to Shaldag (airforce commandos), and 20 are put on the "waiting list" of Matkal. This of course is hearsay from the forums I've been reading online in Hebrew. For now, the best preparation I can do is stay focused, keep up on my rigorous workout schedule, and not stress too much. For now, it should be plenty.

2 days until...

Shana Tova/Gmar Chatima Tova! I'm currently sitting in the Rahamim's dining room. We finished fasting about 4.5 hours ago and broke the fast with delicious fruit and sweets followed by a meat meal. We didn't go to synagogue for 2 reasons. 1, I was afraid that I would get the swine flu in shull and that is the last thing I need two days before Yom Sayarot. The second reason is that they don't typically go to shull here on Yom Kippur. There seems to be an Israeli custom that you fast but you stay at home and watch movies. I took advantage of the Lax Day of Atonement and slept until 12:15 and then woke up and watched a movie (Ben-Hur to be specific). In short, it was a good and easy fast and I'm glad I spent it here. As for Yom Sayarot, Shiri will be driving me to it at the Wingate Institute near Netanya on Wednesday. It starts at 3 pm and lasts 1 day approximately. This means that we will be sleeping there (at least I hope we will be sleeping). I hope this is all information that is not "classified" and that the army will not come after me for disclosing this on the internet. I have to admit that I am a little bit nervous because I really want to get to a specific unit. From the 3-4 options that are possible I have 1 that I would really prefer and another one that I would accept and still be greatly honored. They are all excellent units and to be accepted to any of them is truly extremely difficult. We find out which unit accepts us at the end of the 2-day tryout. Well, not exactly accepts but rather gives you the opportunity to be accepted. Once you pass Yom Sayarot you continue on to the Gibush of the unit that invites you. The Gibush is 5 days and extremely grueling. From what I've heard, Yom Sayarot is more physical and Gibush is more mental. I can't say any of this with absolute certainty, however, since I have not experienced either of them. Whatever way the tryout turns out at least I can sleep soundly knowing that I did all I could to prepare myself. Over the past several weeks I have been training relentlessly and restricting my diet accordingly to what would yield optimal results. My workout schedule went something like this: 3-4 days a week running, 3 days weight lifting/strength training, and the occasional cross-training exercise such as swimming or weighted-cardio (lunges while holding weights).

On a separate note we started picking avocados this past week (Ettinger avocados to be precise). This is exciting because work is no longer so grueling. Picking is a lot easier for 2 reasons: we pick in the trees which provide shade and also I can listen to my music/audiotapes. Some of the other work demands that you listen or simply cannot deal with the iPod. Everything is going relatively well and I just go a package from my parents which really brightened things up. I had a lot of things that I wanted to blog about but it seems I'm too tired tonight. Maybe after Yom Sayarot. 'Night!

Reflections After 1 Year

(My cooking skills in my new Apartment!)


Long time no blog. Almost 5 months to be exact. Since my last entry I have returned home to the United States for a brief respite from Kibbutz and have already come back. I went home on May 9ish and came back to Israel on July 7. It was a great vacation and I really wish I had blogged but no use in crying over spilled milk, right? What did I do at home? Histalbateti = sat around on my ass (isn't it great that there's a Hebrew word for all that?). I went back to work around July 15 and it was good to get back to being useful and not just a waste of space. About 1.5 weeks ago was my one year "anniversary" of arriving in Israel and it got me thinking about what Hannah Hafshoosh (friend of my Dad's) said to me. She said that my parents observed while I was home that I had changed and matured. I told her that I really did not feel as if I had changed that much over the past year and that I feel more or less like the same person. She responded very wisely that we never realize how much we change but the people around us pick up on it much more keenly. I guess that's probably because from our point of view we go through all sorts of transitions that we have to rationalize and work out in our minds so the changes do not seem that stark and glaring but rather labored and insignificant since we invested so much energy in the changes. Your friends and family do not go through your changes for you so when they see you for the first time in months you may seem quite different than that same person they remember you as from 5 months prior. I went back and read all of my blog entries from the past year and wrote down all of the changes that I noticed that I went through. The following are those changes.

When I was working in the Kindergarten during my Ulpan, my Hebrew was passable but I wrote down that I did not feel comfortable speaking Hebrew all day. I distinctly remember that speaking in Hebrew all day actually wore me out physically! Now I more or less speak Hebrew for most of my day without thinking twice about it. It's really good that I've gotten used to the language at such a high level before I join the army. I believe that it will make my integration into it much easier and less painful socially. While I would not say that I am as fluent as an Israeli I would say that I am at such a level where I no longer need my English. If there is a word that I do not know in Hebrew I typically have enough of a vocabulary to describe the word I am searching for. For example, a couple weeks ago I was looking for a spatula in the supermarket on Kibbutz. I did not know how to say spatula so I described it as "the tool you use to turn eggs over in a frying pan". That worked well enough.

My first entry was entitled "The Land of Soy Milk (I'm Lactose-Intolerant) and Honey". You will not find soy milk in my apartment on Kibbutz or any other products for the weak-stomached Americans. One of the things I have learned from being in Israel and working in Agriculture is, "Don't freak out if not everything goes your way." A month before leaving Israel in May, I was anxious about what I was going to do on Kibbutz because picking season was coming to an end in the avocado plantation and I was worried that I would be out of a job with nothing to do. I don't even know where to start about how irrational that fear was. Everything worked out fine and looking back I was irrational and unnecessarily stressing myself out. The wisest person I have met in Israel and possibly in my whole life is my boss in the avocados, Elisha Shelem. He is about 75 years old and is still out in the fields toiling from 5:30 in the morning until 1 in the afternoon. This work is no easy task; if an athletic 19-year-old has trouble getting through the day and comes home completely exhausted how is a 75-year-old veteran of almost every war in Israel's history supposed to do it? But he does, and with perfect patience and compassion. He is the kind of person who you want to ask, "What is your secret? How did you get so wise?" I have a feeling that part of it is working with nature for 50 years and his diligent nature. Elisha has taught me 2 things about avocado trees that are profound in ways that I still cannot fully comprehend. We were putting planks in the ground to straighten and provide support to the newly-planted avocado trees when Elisha explained to me that the planks were superfluous -- it is just the paranoia of the plantation manager. As it turns out, even if an avocado tree is crooked and bent it will continue to grow and if it is too unbalanced it will sprout a branch in the unbalanced direction in order to achieve equilibrium. While you obviously cannot simply leave 100 avocado trees to survive and thrive on their own, you don't have to bind them to a support. They will find their own way to grow. The second thing Elisha taught me about avocado trees is that they have an amazing sense of self-balance with regard to the future and the present. Avocado trees sprout 1 of 2 things at the end of each branch: a leaf or a fruit. A leaf is the tree's way of protecting itself. I assume that by sprouting a leaf it takes in more sunlight thereby undergoing more photosynthesis and yielding more energy to power the tree's processes. When the tree sprouts a fruit, it is trying to protect its future by spreading its seed. If the tree were to only worry about spreading its seed all the time, it would not worry enough about its own health and would therefore die before it had a chance to reproduce. At the other extremity, if a tree only focuses on itself, to what is it giving? Its self-preservation is useless and vain and serves no purpose for the future. If the tree is only for itself, then who is it? If it is only for others, then who is for it? I think Hillel the Elder worked in the avocados.

When I used to get up for ulpan at 7 am, I would be distraught that I had to get up at such an ungodly hour. I was quite uninformed of the definition of early. We typically meet nowadays at 5:30 am in our usual place in the orchard to drink coffee. This means that I get up at 4:45 in the morning. Even the sun doesn't get up at 4:45. There is no such thing as getting used to 4:45. There is just such a thing as coping with it. I guess it's all for the best since I hopefully will be going to the army sometime soon. With regard to the army, there are several updates. Last year I planned on going to the army in March 2009. I then pushed my intended draft date back to July. Then I pushed it back even further to November. All of these postponements took place because they were necessary in order to participate in Yom Sayarot. As it turns out I have to push the draft back one more time until February/March. As it stands, my draft date is February 14, 2010 and on September 30, 2009 I have a try-out for Yom Sayarot at the Wingate Institute near Netanya. We'll see what happens. While I am somewhat annoyed that I have had to wait so long for my draft, at least I now have a very high level of Hebrew and am used to my surroundings (Israel).

I was talking with my sister Ilana about a month ago when she suggested the idea of perhaps writing a book about my experience once I get out of the army in several years from now. I think it's a great idea and that perhaps all of my blog entries could either stand as a book on their own or at least provide a structure to build the book around. Even though there are already several books that have been published by formers soldiers who made Aliyah from the United States, I think every story is valuable because every one describes in its own right the unique experience that is making Aliyah at a young age from the United States. Also, all of the books that I read on this topic helped me immensely and I think it would be nice to do the same for those brave enough to follow suit. In any case, I first have to worry about getting through the army healthily and willing to write a book. I wonder what changes I'll be able to document one year from now. Happy start of the school year!

You Know... -- סתם

Hag Sameach (happy holidays) or more specifically happy Pesach (Passover) to everyone! May your ephemeral fast from leavened products feel swift and not burdensome! I spent this year's seder at the Rahamim's in Holon. I came in contact with them through their daughter who is presently a Shlicha at the Jewish Agency in Fairfax, VA and is doing very good work in changing the way people look at Israel! It was a lovely 2 days I spent with them and coming back to Kibbutz I feel renewed. Since the last time I blogged I have been working as usual and working out with the army fitness group as usual. This past Tuesday I went to get my Teudat Ma'avar (or temporary travel document) so that I may go home for a brief respite from Israeli Balagan and some good R&R. The army is giving me trouble. They say that I am not able to go to Sayerot for some "reason" so I am fighting with them now to let me in. The answer is never really "no" in Israel; rather, it is often just, "well...we're going to be stubborn and make your life difficult so you have to try harder." It reminds me of the phrase, "There are no laws, just guidelines." Similar concepts/boundaries. I really have slacked on a couple of things: exercise, Hebrew, and education. Exercise in the sense that despite the fact that I am training with this group twice a week and sometimes running additionally, I feel I could still be in better shape. Then again, it's not like I'm sitting in a cubicle all day typing email or playing solitaire. I'm working hard out in the fields "toiling the land". Hebrew, despite the fact that I speak it during 80-90% of my day, could always use improvement especially since I am going into the army where the Hebrew will be at such a level that fluent Hebrew is not enough; I must also be familiar with slang and the modern, 'hip' Hebrew spoken by 18-year-olds. Education must obviously be delayed until after the army but I still always have the feeling that I should be constantly reading and learning something new. There's so much to learn from so many sources! Unfortunately, time is the factor that gets in the way of accomplishing these 3 things. I'd love to hear from you all (if anyone even reads this blog anymore!). Here's my email: benjacobs1027@comcast.net

Stay in touch and here are 2 links of me playing piano that were just recorded recently.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSRKGDTz59c&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=peeC--W5K7k&feature=channel

(Picture from the Purim party a couple of weeks ago)



A word to the Semitic-linguistically impaired (is that grammatically impaired?), I apologize for the Hebrew entries or rather your inability to comprehend them. For the most part I will be blogging what's going on in both languages so don't worry, you won't miss anything too heavy. In the most recent entry I talked about what's been troubling me lately. I don't feel like delving into the topic, but in short, the stability of my situation is starting to destabilize. That may sound more grave than it is, actually. It's just that the avocado picking season will soon come to an end and from there the only work that remains will be trimming the trees. Unfortunately, there is no profit from tree trimming and hedge work so they will have less work for me if any work at all. My host family, the Perry's, continue to be beyond hospitable and warm and they have no problem with me staying them even longer, however, I would not feel okay just sitting around in the house half the week or not working. Hopefully there is more work on Kibbutz that will keep me busy until my November 1, 2009 draft into the army (then again, if it turns out that there IS in fact more work with the avocados, there will be no problem at all!). The second thing that is getting under my skin is the army. I called the draft office, more specifically the Sayarot department, to make sure that they received my personal request asking for the opportunity to try out at Yom Sayarot (Special Forces Day would be a decent translation). They said they did, of course me having faxed it 4 times prior as well, and that "they" (very Orwellian) did not approve me to try out. The weird part is that I fit for Air Force testing (considered higher than special forces) yet they turned me down for this. Tomorrow I will get a recommendation, as per the Special Forces Department representative's recommendation, from my trainer from the fitness groups. I assume that he has influence and hopefully his recommendation will suffice in getting me an opportunity to participate in Yom Sayarot. If not, I also know others who may be able to help.

I got so wrapped up in the last section I forgot what I was dying to write about before I even started this entry. I have not written about this until now (I think) but at the beginning of the ulpan about 6-7 months ago I asked my Hebrew teacher for a key to the music room. It's quite a spacious room with an aged but sturdy and bright-sounding piano. The piano has been the one thing throughout this whole experience that I have been able to depend on as a sort of calming or zen therapy if you will. I only took note of it tonight but I guess it happens everytime I am playing -- I become so focused and entranced on what I am playing that I forgot about everything else going on. The stress dissolves into the background; I forget about the blisters on my feet from running in wet shoes at 9:30 pm the previous night, the army, Hebrew, English. You name it, it disappears. In a good way obviously. It is almost like a very intense form of active reading. It doesn't matter if I am playing through the piece fluidly or whether I miss a few beats to correct my hand position on the A minor seventh chord, the bottom line is that I am IN the moment and in the piece. I don't think this happens in any other instance in my life. I was just playing Praeludium in E Minor by Mendelssohn-Bartholdy and, though it is not one of my most practiced and fluid pieces to play, I think it is the composition I enjoy most (of course, outside of Chopin's Prelude in E Minor). I have no doubt that if I were given the choice to pursue any career I wanted to I would pursue music. Unfortunately, it will simply have to remain a much-loved hobby since a music career would be nearly impossible at this point. This would be the realist Ben and not the idealist Ben speaking but I am not dissappointed by this reality at all. That's all for now. Stay in contact.

בקריזה! אוי

הכל מבולגן עכשיו! יום אחד אני יודע בדיוק מה שאני עושה ותכניותי, ויום לאחריו אין לי שום מושג! זה מצב די מתסכל. קודם כל, יש הסיטואציה לרגל עבודה. הקטיף עומד להיגמר ואחר כך לא יהיה רווח שיצא מהאבוקדוים. לפיכך, הם צריכים לחסוך יותר. בגלל המצב הזה, כנראה שתהיה לי פחות עבודה או שלא תהיה לי עבודה בכלל. בנוסף, המשבר הפיננסי לא עוזר. יכול להיות שיש תפקידים פנויים במקומות אחרים בקיבוץ אבל יש בעיה שנשארת אפילו אם יש בגלל שאני אחזור הבייתה במאי. מזה עולה האלטרנטיבי שאני הייתי יכול לעבור למקום אחר ולעשות אולפן מתקדם או עבודה אחרת. זה לא בא לי כל כך בגלל שכבר הסתדרתי פה בקיבוץ ואילו הייתי עובר למקום אחר, דברים יסתבכו וכו'. הבעיה השניה זאת שהתקשרתי ללשכת הגיוס היום כדי לברר כמה דברים לגבי השאלון (מאנילה) שלי. הופתעתי והיפריע לי כשהנציגה אמרה שהם קיבלו את הפקס שלי שביקש להתמודד ביום סיירות אבל הם לא אישרו לי לקבל זימון. היא אמרה שזה לא משהו קשור לבריאות שלי, אלא משהו אחר שהיא לא יכולה לגלות. היא גם אמרה שאני יכול לשלוח בקשה אישית נוספת וזה היה עוזר אם יש מצורף לבקשה אישית המלצה על ידי מישהו "ידוע" או אם השפעה בצבא. זהו לעכשיו, תיצרו קשר בבקשה! בי

אהלן וו סהלן

ערב טוב וברוכים הבאים לחלק העברית של הבלוג שלי! הלוואי שזה יהיה ברור ושלא יהיו יותר מדי שגיאות. קודם כל, אני לא אתחיל מתחילת החווית אולפן...זה היה לוקח לנצח. אלא אני אמשיך מאיפה שהפסקתי בפרקים האחרונים באנגלית. היה לי האימון השלישי עם הקפוצת כושר (שנקרא "כושר אקסטרים") והוא, בדיוק כמו הפעמים הקודמות, היה מעולה. אני לא יודע למה אני נהנה מהאימונים האלה כל כך הרבה אבל לאחר כל אימון, אני מאוד מתרגש. האימון היום התקיים בחוף הים בקרית חיים באיזה מקום שנקרא "בלנגה". התחלנו עם כמה סיבובים מסביב הצריף של המציל. אף אחד לא רצה להיכנס למים אבל התרגול הזה לא נתן לנו ברירה: חצי מהשטח מסביב לצריף מציל היה חול והחצי האחר היה מים. עשינו מספר שכיבות סמיכה (ובמספר אני מתכוון כ100 אחרי שרצנו בספרינט 12 דקות בחול שבו שקענו חבל על הזמן). המחיר הצרפות מאוד הוגן ובאימון הבא אני אשלם ואהפוך ל"חבר כושר אקסטרים". זהו בינתים, אם הבנת את זה נא להשאיר הערות ומשוב (פידבק)! יאללה, לילה טוב לכם